I hate everything.

"I have absolutely no wish to sell either player and to date we have not accepted any offer for either. However, when a player's head is turned and their commitment is absent, particularly when they occupy key positions such as that of striker, they become a negative influence in a team dressing room in which they were once a positive addition and influence. This is the situation we now have on our hands, with both Dimitar and Robbie having made it clear that they wish to leave for Manchester Utd and Liverpool respectively.

"Irrespective of the outcome and futures of Robbie and Dimitar, we are continuing to seek to bring in quality, talented players for the future, who want to play in a Spurs shirt."

-Daniel Levy, Spurs Chairman

In what could hardly be considered a surprising move, Manchester United have bid £20 million pounds for Tottenham Hotspur striker Dimitar Berbatov. Sir Alex Ferguson has long been reported to be an admirer of Berbatov's, and really, who isn't? United will be looking to cover their bases in the event Cristiano Ronaldo is sold to Real Madrid. Berbatov would certainly help to recover a good portion of Ronaldo's forty goals should the winger leave. The Bulgarian striker would fill the currently absent role of target forward for the Premier League champions. His arrival would be of great benefit to forwards Wayne Rooney and Carlos Tevez. Both players prefer to play from deep positions, in similar fashion to Berbatov's current strike partner Robbie Keane. Berbatov could form a partnership with either player that could prove just as effective as the one he enjoys with Keane.

However, Tottenham will certainly reject the current offer, putting the transfer on hold for a little while longer. Spurs value Berbatov at around £30 million and will be determined to get full value for their talismanic striker if forced to sell. A factor that will also be at the forefront of Spurs Chairman Daniel Levy's mind will be the status of Cristiano Ronaldo. If Ronaldo is sold to Real Madrid for the extraordinary prices being bandied about in the papers, Spurs will smell blood in the water. The influx of cash at United from the Ronaldo deal will drive the Berbatov's price up even higher. Which is why United have placed their bid now. They'll hope that Berbatov pushes for the transfer to be completed, meaning that United will get him at closer to the £30 million price Tottenham have placed on him then in an inflated post-Ronaldo sale. Spurs, for their part, will try to hold out for a Ronaldo transfer.

Berbatov's departure could also speed the departure of Robbie Keane to Liverpool. The Irishman will be more likely to leave if the player with whom he has been described as having a 'telepathic' relationship has left for greener pastures. While the club will be hesitant to let both players leave, Keane's value to Juande Ramos will certainly be diminished if Berbatov leaves. Darren Bent has also been linked with a move to Roy Keane's Sunderland. Indeed, Tottenham's forward stable, formerly the club's strongest asset , could look strangely empty in the near future.

The BBC is reporting that Tottenham Hotspur is closing in on the signing of Espanyol forward Luis Garcia. To clarify, that's the Luis Garcia pictured above, not the former Liverpool player. He's bagged 24 goals in 79 appearances for the Spanish side and Juande Ramos apparently rates the the striker highly. You can see for yourself why he does here. Garcia's signing will do nothing to quiet rumors of Robbie Keane and Dimitar Berbatov departing Tottenham this off-season. While there have been no concrete rumors regarding Berbatov, speculation intensified over Robbie Keane's future after quotes from Rafa Benitez regarding Keane surfaced. Benitez acknowledged Liverpool's interest in Keane after admitting that Liverpool were unlikely to pry David Villa away from Spanish side Valencia. Benitez was quoted as saying, "I said the other day that he is one of the names we had on our list, but I can say at this moment that it is not an option for us...We know Villa is a very good player, we know the price and we know the players we have, so when you consider everything we decided he was one of the names, but at this moment, not our target...Keane is one of the other names and okay we are still working with other names. We were in contact and we will see now."

FIFA President and perennial buffoon Sepp Blatter has revealed that he has spoken to three different Football Associations about the possibility of hosting the 2010 World Cup if South Africa were to fall victim to a 'natural catastrophe'. The Football Associations in question confirmed they would be able to host the tournament on short notice, but would need a year to prepare. Now, everyone realizes that Sepp Blatter isn't talking about a natural catastrophe forcing the tournament out of South Africa. The concern is whether or not South Africa will be able to complete the stadiums and have the infrastructure in place necessary to host an event of the World Cup's magnitude. It has already been revealed that South Africa's Port Elizabeth stadium will not be ready in time for the 2009 Confederations Cup. This failure raises legitimate concerns over South Africa's ability to be fully prepared for the World Cup. These concerns make it necessary for FIFA to have a contingency plan in place, should South Africa not live up to its commitments. There are several countries Blatter could have spoken to about hosting the tournament on a year's notice. These include, but aren't limited to, the United States, England, Spain, Germany, Italy, and Australia. All of these countries have the stadiums and the infrastructure to host the World Cup. Who do I think Blatter spoke to? I would think he would have approached the United States, England and Spain. The US was home to the 1994 World Cup which, due to America's enormous stadiums, still holds the record for highest average per game attendance. If the US were to host the World Cup in 2010 it would surely shatter all attendance and revenue records due to the fact that the World Cup expanded from 24 teams to 32 teams in 1998, adding an additional twelve games. The fact that the World Cup was in Europe in 2006 will give the US a leg up on its European competitors. England, with its Premier League stadiums and public transportation system, would be able to host the World Cup. The fact that they haven't hosted the tournament since 1966 would also give them an advantage as well. Spain brings the same advantages as England and their recent victory at Euro 2008 will make them an attractive prospect. As for the other three possibilities, I don't think Blatter spoke to them for several reasons. Germany proved itself capable of pulling off a fantastic tournament in 2006, but it's highly unlikely FIFA would give it back to them just four years later. Italy certainly would be capable of hosting the tournament, but recent match-fixing scandals and incidents of fan violence make the home of the Azzuri something of an unattractive destination. Australia hosted the 2000 Olympics, but its far-flung location will hurt it.

In my opinion, however, all speculation on the subject is moot. I believe South Africa will get their act together in time and the World Cup will conquer another continent. Far too much money has been sunk into this endeavor just to abandon it because some FIFA bigwigs feel uncomfortable with South Africa hosting the tournament. If somehow the plug is pulled, I think the 2010 tournament goes to England and the US gets 2018.

In an example of absolutely flabbergasting greed, 30-year-old Frank Lampard has turned down a four-year, £140,000-a-week deal with Chelsea. Lampard claims he will not resign with Chelsea unless the contract is increased to five years, an unreasonable request from a thirty year old. Understandably, Chelsea have no desire to be paying a 35 year old such an exorbitant amount of money. Lampard seems to be posturing for a move to Italian club Inter Milan and a reunion with former manager Jose Mourinho. The new Inter manager is said to have stepped up the pressure on Chelsea to sell Lampard before his contract runs out next year by increasing his offer to £10 million. The situation was exacerbated by Luis Felipe Scolari's claim that Lampard had expressed a desire to remain at Stamford Bridge, even though no such conversation had taken place. Scolari's press conference allegedly led to a heated exchange between Lampard and Chelsea chief executive Peter Kenyon. Chelsea will certainly be tempted to offload Lampard for £10 million now, rather than lose him to Mourinho for nothing next summer. It's likely we'll see Lampard in the blue and black of Inter before long.